Thursday, June 30, 2016

Resilience. Self reliance. Resourcefulness.

Me, hugging my first dog, 1972.

A baby boomer looks back.

I think kids born in the 1950s and 1960s had the opportunity to try and fail, and their experiences engendered real, contextual learning that prepared them to succeed. Sometimes our parents would say, “good job,” but a pat on the back wasn’t the driving force propelling baby boomers to achieve.

When I was in high school, I ran track. No one came to watch me at a track meet, but it didn't make me feel bad because no one else's parents were there, either. Participation in team sports was driven by the individual child and not by parents who herded or guided kids to take certain paths.

Parents weren’t hyper-vigilant. I believe it's because it wasn't needed. For example, choosing to be part of a team meant there was an intrinsic desire to work cooperatively to achieve a goal. Improvements were based on learning from mistakes, and healthy competition provided important lessons.

These days I think it’s difficult to stay out of the affairs of our children. We want to smooth their paths. But does parental assistance (or interference) really help them, or does it disable their ability to learn to solve problems on their own?

When I was a teenager, I wanted contact lenses. But didn’t feel I could ask my family to pay for something so extravagant. I also knew I would need things for when I moved out for college in the fall: dishes, silverware, glasses, sheets and towels, pots and pans, small appliances, and a bicycle. In order to make it happen, it took planning. 

I worked three jobs — part-time after school, a baby sitting gig in the evenings, and a weekend job at Jay Jacobs, where I served on their fashion board. I was able to pay the $600 needed to buy contact lenses, and also saved enough for the bicycle and other things on my list.

This all sounds very much like, “I had to walk ten miles in the snow to get to school,” but it's meant to say hard work is often necessary to get where we want to go. And when self-identified goals are in our sights, we have real incentives to achieve them.

It makes me wonder if every generation feels life was tough when they were young? The saying, “Where there is a will, there’s a way,” is profoundly true. I hope our desire to make life easier for our kids allows them to develop goals, and devise ways to achieve them without mom's and dad’s help.

Resilience. Self reliance. Resourcefulness. Encouraging these qualities could be among the greatest gifts we give to our children.

More about Terri

Saturday, April 30, 2016

How to Deal with Disappointment


It’s weird how you can be merrily be rolling along when something you don’t want to happen, happens. 

I was in the eighth grade when my family moved from Seattle to Arizona. Middle school is an awkward time, and I was just hitting my stride socially and emotionally. Suddenly I found myself leaving my friends and life for a place with virtually no racial diversity—very different from Seattle. I was initially regarded as somewhat of a freak.

Even so, I managed to adjust to Arizona, and after two years, my dad’s Boeing assignment was done, so we were able to return to Seattle. When we got home, everything was different. Our house had been rented, and the yard, which had always been meticulously maintained, had been completely neglected. In fact, as we drove up to the house, Caesar, a neighborhood kid, was playing with friends and popped his head up from the tall grass that, much to the chagrin of our neighbors, used to be our lawn.

The worst disappointment was learning my parents were going to divorce. At that time, divorce was shameful. Asians stayed unhappily married forever rather than cast shame on their families. But my dad had fallen in love with another woman.

I was embarrassed to be from a “broken home.” I knew people talked about us. There was nothing I could do to alter the situation, so I just kept forging ahead, maintaining my grades, and taking after school and weekend jobs to help. I was thinking of my own misery and not thinking about the deeper humiliation my mom must have been experiencing. 

As harsh as it was to have divorced parents and to live a new life at poverty level, I filled out my own college applications, applied for grants and ended up at a community college because it was the only school that offered me money. 

Working my way through college was amazing accomplishment, but I’ve often wished I could say I’d had financial support from my family.

Many parents today want to avoid subjecting their kids to negative fallout. Not just in instances like divorce, but in any challenges their kids could face where there is a potential of disappointment.

Today I was talking with a friend about her disabled child. Despite the disability, her son is able to attend college part time. taking one to two classes each quarter. In his classes, he performs at an exceptional level.

She believes her son should be on the Dean’s list because he maintains a 3.7 GPA. But the school has a rule that says students must be full-time students in order to be considered for the Dean’s list, so he isn’t eligible.

My friend is upset because she feels her son is disabled, and therefore not subject to the rules that govern able-bodied kids. That said, able-bodied kids taking a full load also have a challenge—juggling the work that comes with taking additional credits. 

She will fight tooth and nail to change the school’s policy, and knowing how smart and tenacious she is, there is a good chance she will succeed.

It’s frustrating and sad to have a child who is less abled, and to see rules in place that exclude them from prizes and recognition. But is it the child’s disappointment, or the parent’s?

Her story came on the heels of a discussion with a colleague yesterday about the tendency for today’s parents to protect their children from failure and disappointment. Preemptively smoothing paths for children is well-intentioned, but I think can be a disservice because it impedes opportunities for children to learn to resolve problems on their own.

A disabled child is very different than an able-bodied child. But in both cases, there is a certainty — at some point everyone experiences disappointment. 

We’ll never become desensitized to disappointment, whatever the cause. Things will always happen that we don't want to happen. My wise friend, York, offers an answer: “Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.” These are words I’ve come to live by.


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POSTSCRIPT: My friend was successful in forcing the University of Washington to change their policy, and it now allows part-time students to be included on the Dean's List.
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More about Terri

Monday, February 29, 2016

Enjoy free books, movies, music, digital media & the Internet

Through The Seattle Public Library

The Sally Goldmark Library in Madrona is our local branch.
Sometimes I think my husband, David, and I are the only people in Seattle who don’t subscribe to Netflix or Hulu.

I guess one reason why is, we aren’t huge consumers of video content and we'd regard it as wasteful to pay for something we won’t use.

We like watching films and television series, but since we opened Alki Surf Shop, we have even less discretionary time, including TV time. We spend an average of about an hour each evening watching films or programs.

Truth be told, we’d dearly love to “cut the Comcast cord,” but there are certain channels that would be a bummer to lose, like Bloomberg News, and any channel that airs "Law and Order" episodes :) 

The concept of getting rid of cable became more of a possibility when David discovered a treasure trove of content available through The Seattle Public Library (SPL). He regularly visits the SPL web site, and when he sees movies or TV shows that look promising, we “get it in the queue.” 

Built in 1919, our branch
was a former firehouse
We’ve come to rely on SPL to supply us with most of our viewing entertainment. Most everything is available regardless of the original source, including new movies and exclusive programming like House of Cards, Game of Thrones or Orange is the New Black.

I imagine what we’re doing harkens back to the early days of Netflix. When we request movies and shows, we receive them in the order they become available. SPL notifies us when the media are delivered to our neighborhood library branch for pick up. You’re allowed to check out 50 items at the same time, so patrons can binge watch/read/listen.

I found some pretty amazing statistics about our library. Among them:
  • In 2014, there were 13,810,274 visits to the central library, branches, and virtual visits
  • 11,744,874 books, DVDs, CDs, audiobooks and digital downloads were circulated
  • In addition, 831,412 reference questions were answered. 
When I want to check facts, have a grammar question, or need information on a company, SPL’s Quick Information is amazing. It’s like having a research assistant at the tip of your fingertips. SPL even offers homework help.

Earlier this month I wrote a story about our AirBNB houseand its lack of connectivity. Through one of the blog comments, I learned about SPL’s wifi hotspot program.

Thanks to the Seattle Public Library Foundation, and a $225,000 grant from Google, SPL now has 150 portable wifi hotspots available to loan to library users. Says city librarian Marcellus Turner, "Loaning mobile hotspots to people living without broadband access is another way The Seattle Public Library is taking our mission beyond the walls of our libraries and directly to our patrons where they are."

SPL's Verizon hotspot is small and amazing
Verizon is the only major carrier to provide cell phone service to The Horsfall House near Mount Rainier. Since I'm a fan and supporter of  Verizon, I asked Sharon Griggins, Director of Development and Communications for the SPL Foundation how they chose their hotspot provider. Her response was, “To the best of my knowledge, the Library went with Verizon as the provider for the hotspots after checking with several vendors to see who would have the best deal and the best service for our area."  So, it was very much in the spirit of #bettermatters!

For all of us who experience completely connected lives, the Internet is something we take for granted. But there are many for whom access to the Internet is a luxury.

Lots of people think: Library: books. But the Seattle Public Library continues to evolve, and really brings the wired world within reach of everyone.

It’s pretty obvious I’m a library fan, and I’m also proud to be a donor. 

Seattle friends, if you value our amazing resource, I invite you to join me in supporting the Seattle Public Library! 

"Connecting Seattle," and "Reader in window" images via The Seattle Public Library and The Seattle Public Library Foundation.
Wifi hotspot image via Verizon. Goldmark Library images © Terri Nakamura 2016.


Special thanks to Melissa Nakamura and Elizabeth Carpenter for their help.
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Disclosure: As a member of a great group of Verizon influencers, I'm invited to share my honest thoughts on cool products to test drive. No additional compensation is provided, nor are favorable comments promised. All opinions are my own.
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More about Terri

Thursday, December 31, 2015

Goodbye 2015; Hello 2016

Goodbye 2015, Hello 2016

This final day of 2015
started out pretty normally. Woke up, fed the cats, put on my make-up, got dressed, then looked at my to-do list. All doable!


I needed to pick up my car from my mechanic of 19 years, and no one was around to drive me there, so I called Uber. Uber was in 50 percent surge-price mode, so I said, forget that! Opened Lyft and put in my location and request...

Lyft did something weird. I watched the Lyft car circle around, then was notified the car had arrived. Scanning all directions—no Lyft. The driver calls and tells me he is in West Seattle. Uh, yeah. I was 20 minutes away in Madrona. Wonder what happened? Obviously I couldn't wait for him, so I called my old standby, Farwest Taxi. They said it would be 15 minutes until a cab would reach me. No thanks. In this age of "I have no time to wait," I called Yellow Cab next. They arrived in 5 minutes.

An older East African gentleman was driving and he wouldn't exceed 25 MPH. Drove me kind of nuts, actually, and eventually I jumped out a few blocks early and sprinted to my mechanic.

Let me just back up by saying my family and I went to Star Wars on Tuesday evening. We were in a hurry (of course), but I wanted to grab my gloves out of my car. When I shut the door, I don't know how it was possible, but I slammed it shut on my Northface jacket. The door would. not. open.  I had to twist around to extricate myself, then left the jacket hanging outside the door, then ran into the house and got another down coat. (It's really cold here right now.)


Weird how the door wouldn't open

My car was scheduled for a tune up at CarTender Wednesday, so I figured I'd ask them to get the door unjammed. I felt pretty lame driving there with my coat partly hanging outside the car.

CarTender always washes and vacuums my car. But this time, I got there and it was still dirty. I asked the car-washing crew what was up, they said, "Well, at least we got your coat out of the door :)" Whoops. I was an ingrate! I paid my bill, wished some of the guys happy new year, drove away and was on to my next errand.

So we got a coupon for a free box of litter from Mud Bay. The coupon expires today. My plan was to pick up the litter after retrieving my car.

After searching 15 minutes for the store, it turned out Mud Bay moved. Guess where? Just a few blocks from my mechanic! Hey, let's drive all around Capitol Hill for no reason! Yay!

I got to the new location for Mud Bay, but of course there was no parking. So I parked next door at the convenience store, ran in, bought a bag of chips and asked the guy if it would be okay to leave my car there a few minutes.

Zipped into Mud Bay, bag of chips in hand. I thought I should buy something since they were going to give me a box of litter, so I grabbed 10 rattle mice. Rattle mice are toys for cats that look like mice—covered with fur, with ears, a nose, eyes and tail. They have something inside that rattle, which somehow makes it more fun for cats.

Got to the checkout and guess what? They were out of the Oko litter and had no idea when they would get some—a supply chain issue or something. So I bought the rattle mice anyway. I now found myself with a bag of chips and 10 rattle mice I didn't need.


Sweet dog at Mud Bay


But what's this? Lyft notifies me they are billing me $5 for a ride cancellation. What a minute. They never showed up. Is that considered a cancellation? Grrrr! 

Next stop: Costco. What do you know? I got a great parking spot just outside the door! Finally, things were looking up!

Costco was a total zoo but I managed to get my stuff and get out within an hour.

As I loaded my car, I walked around to the passenger side, and wow. There was a five-dollar bill on the asphalt! That almost paid for my cab ride!

Seeing that my day was on the upswing, I had to feel better about the way it started. It was riddled with what my friend Reg likes to call, "first-world problems."

So this evening, to celebrate new year's eve, we met two long-time friends for dinner at Cafe Lago, one of our favorites. The food reminds us of Tuscany. 

One friend got very drunk and knocked over a full glass of water onto the table, my phone and into my lap. Nice. 

After dinner we walked out, freezing pant legs from where I was doused with water, and with drunken friend singing loudly (and out of tune), "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling." I don't know if I'd lost that lovin' feeling, but I was starting to lose feeling in my legs.

Walked in the door to our home. A phone call from our property manager, saying our AirBNB guests lost power on the second floor. Oh, no! 

David told them where to find the circuit breaker. Power restored. All good!

Ready to say goodbye to 2015, I am counting my blessings, I have a wonderful husband, kids, friends and clients. I love our store, Alki Surf Shop, and blessed with many great people in our lives. And I'm also grateful to have my health. Next September 1 will be my 10th anniversary in remission. I'm ready for 2016!

Happy New year to everyone!

If you have any great 2015 stories, I'd love to read them!


Family together for Christmas, including our two dogs, Grey and Hunter

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Verizon Wireless has given me the opportunity to use some of their products. Family photo and coat in the door shot with a Motorola Droid Turbo 2. No other compensation has been received for any of the links mentioned.

Special thanks to Jennifer for inspiring me to write this!



More about Terri:

Monday, November 30, 2015

Fall Into a Savory Soup


After traveling in New York for several days to attend a Verizon Summit (#vzsummit), and enjoying meals at fabulous restaurants there, I returned, craving home made comfort food.

Just before the trip, I roasted a pretty sizable pumpkin (uncarved), yielding a two large sheet pans of delicious pieces of roasted pumpkin. 

So before heading into Alki Surf Shop on Saturday, I searched for a pumpkin soup recipe, and found one that looked good, but I didn’t have some of the ingredients.

Never one to let a missing ingredient stop me, I forged on!

The original recipe, Thai Pumpkin Soup with Coconut Milk, called for lemongrass, fresh coriander, vegetable stock and coconut milk. But I didn’t have any of those things. So here’s what I did:

Terri’s Pantry Pumpkin Soup
Ingredients: 
  • 2 TB Olive Oil
  • 1.5 medium onions, diced
  • 5 cloves of garlic left whole
  • 3.5 lbs. of roasted pumpkin, diced*
  • 1 tsp ground coriander 
  • 2 tsp curry powder
  • 2 TB fresh minced ginger** (which BTW, was frozen—more below)
  • zest of half a lemon

Stock
Ingredients: 
  • 4 cups water plus 4 chicken bouillon cubes
  • 1/4 tsp ground coriander 
  • 1/4 tsp onion power
  • 1/4 garlic powder

I’d already roasted the pumpkin and had it on hand, and as anyone who likes roasted vegetables knows, it's the most flavorful way to eat veggies. All you have to do is coat your veggies with olive oil, sprinkle with salt and pepper, than place on cookie sheets for about an hour at 450 degrees. OMG.

Soup Directions:
  1. Heat the oil in a large stock pot, dump in the garlic and onions, and sauté until translucent
  2. Add chopped pumpkin, minced ginger, 1 tsp of coriander and 2 tsp of curry, and cook for about 5 minutes. It will look sort of mushy.
  3. Dissolve 4 chicken bouillon cubes in a quart of warm water, then add 1/4 tsp onion powder; 1/4 tsp garlic powder; and 1/4 tsp ground coriander to the stock. (Since I didn’t have vegetable stock (in the original recipe) and had just used the last 4 cans of chicken stock to make pumpkin soup earlier this week, this was a workaround.)
  4. Dump the stock into the pumpkin mixture and bring to a boil.
  5. Simmer for 30 minutes, then add the zest of 1/2 lemon 

The cool part!

My adorable sister gave me a immersion stick blender a few years ago. Since then, I bought another, and another and have gifted four of them to family and friends. I LOVE THEM!

Does it Blend? 

You bet! In the stockpot, if you have a stick blender, just BLEND IT.

In a few minutes, you have an amazing, rich soup. And since I skipped adding the coconut milk listed in the original recipe, I have to think it has a whole lot fewer calories.

SIMPLY YUMMY! Give it a try, or give me a shout with any questions and I'll do my best to answer.

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BONUS STUFF

*Roasted Pumpkin
  1. Wash, core (save the seeds!) and cut up the pumpkin into chucks. Mine were around 5-6” in size.
  2. Coat the pieces with olive oil, sprinkle with salt and pepper
  3. Single layer on cookie sheet(s) place into a 450 degree oven for about an hour. The fleshy part of the pumpkin with be fork tender.
  4. Peel the skin and chop up. I even eat the pumpkin with a bit of butter as a (sort of bland) side dish.
**Ginger trick!

I always store ginger root in the freezer. It keeps beautifully. For this recipe, I took a chunk that came to about 2 TB, and microwaved  it for 30 seconds, turned it and gave it another 30. The skin just slid off! I then julienned, then minced. 


Roasted pumpkin seeds

The pumpkin seeds were washed and drained. I threw a tablespoon of Johnny’s seasoning salt and mixed around and left it standing for an hour or so. I then spread on a cookie sheet and put into a 450 degrees oven, roasting until golden brown. They’re so good, I eat the entire thing, shell and all.

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My mobile lifestyle has been made possible in part through the largesse of Verizon Wireless. Just getting acquainted with my new Droid Turbo 2 and the ultra cool Moto 360 Smart Watch. 


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Monday, August 31, 2015

With a Little Help From My Friends


It’s been a year since my husband, Kahuna Dave, and I opened our store, Alki Surf Shop, in West Seattle. The past 12 months have been filled with lots of laughter and learning, and we’ve met thousands of great people from nearby and all over the world. We’ve made new friends, rekindled past friendships, and love being a part of the Alki Beach community.

It feels like we’ve been on a business “graduate school” crash course. We're smarter store owners now, and continue to evolve. Among some of the things we've learned: How to create a positive experience for people who visit; how to identify products that make sense; and how to work more effectively with suppliers.

My husband's vision of "Hawaii-Beach-California" is fun, and comes through clearly in our store, from the fixtures to the colors and raffia and bamboo trim.

One of the things I made a conscious effort to do is to incorporate my friends in the creation of our unique space. We’re constantly hearing from visitors that they love our store. Maybe one of the reasons is, there is so much love that has gone into making it special.

So, this blog post is dedicated to the people who have been supportive to me in myriad ways, and given me all sorts of wonderful presents that are now part of Alki Surf Shop. I like knowing they are there with us every day. Without them, Alki Surf Shop would be a much less personal and less eclectic place.

Gallery


My friend, Paula, has great taste. She’s given me a ton of wonderful things over the decades. Two I’ve incorporated into the shop include a narrow Italian dish, now filled with bracelets;


and a palm leaf dish, used to display some of our brass items


While I went through chemo in 2006, Mary, my bestie in the 7th grade and former roommate in college, gave me a basket she’d filled with indulgent lotions, fragrances and soaps. It’s now the home of our custom reversible Tyvek Alki Beach bags, popularized by Martha Stewart.


Suzanne, a close friend since the 1970s and fellow animal lover, gave me this dish a long time ago. We use it to keep change left for/by our new friends.



On our front counter you'll often see a pretty hand-made glass vase from good friend and fellow AirBNB host Jennifer. It works perfectly with a single bloom.


Jennifer also gave me this hand-made ceramic that holds pens for our customers to use. Alongside is an awesome Crane's note book from my friend, Lynne. We're using it as a guest book.


Charmaine, like Jennifer, goes back to what I call the “golden age” in Pioneer Square. Our husbands are close buddies, and she’s one of my favorites. This great  Chinese bowl came from one of her trips.


Three long-time friends are called the “Killer Bs,” and include Sue, MR and Lynne. Together we formed a PR firm that handled the public relations for the Washington State Centennial. In our store: a fused glass dish from Sue;  


a woven basket from Lynne; 



and a basket from MR’s recent trip to Africa.



 My family has also contributed time and treasures to Alki Surf Shop. My sister, Melissa, stocks us with Alki earrings and gave me a stand to display them; 


 Carol, my sister-in-law, bequeathed some Hawaiian things from her mom, Melba (long-time West Seattle resident), including two large Tiki masks that flank the main table legs; 


 a palm-leaf wall hanging;



and a portrait of Melba’s pug, by a Hawaiian artist.


Wendy and I have known each other longer than I’ve known my husband (37+ years). When she moved to Hawaii from 10 years on Alki, she left us her beautiful collection of sea glass.


Linda and I began as work colleagues in 2007, and have remained friends ever since. She's a well-known expert in the field of Internet safety and made it her mission to educate people. The carved Indonesian bowl she gave me is currently the home to our plumeria clips!


Cecile is a fascinating friend and former work colleague. When she moved from a Seattle bungalow to a cool floating home on Lake Union, she let go of some of her furnishings, including this cute table, now home to one of our most popular items — falsa blankets.


My friend Patt gave me this basket. The great shape and design make it perfect for almost anything. Right now it’s a nest for some shell coin purses.


I’ve known Nena for five years. She's a fellow shop owner and has mentored me during the past year. I’m currently using this cigar box as a platform for shark salt and pepper shakers, but it's one of those cool things you can use for anything.


Whether or not they know it, my friends have been with me on this journey. It feels great when I'm in the store surrounded by their presence. If you stop by, you'll get to "meet" them, too!

If you're going to be in the area, give a call at 206.403.1901. If I'm there, it will be fun to see you!

Mahalo!

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My relationship with Verizon enabled me to acquire some fantastic technology that has supported our store, including a Nokia Lumia 2520 tablet, Nokia Lumia Icon, Belkin Netcam, and Canary. We frequently receive comments about our UE Boom speaker that powers the music for our store, and I wouldn’t be able to shoot such high-quality images for Instagram without the Samsung Galaxy Note 4.

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Photos in this post were shot using the Galaxy Note 4.
Lead image: What you see as you walk into Alki Surf Shop (featuring our #Verizon #Belkin HD Netcam on the top shelf, to the right)

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Alki Surf Shop on Twitter: https://twitter.com/AlkiSurfShop
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